Infidelity remains one of the most challenging issues couples face in relationships. When examining the data, patterns emerge across different demographics.
Studies consistently show that men cheat more than women overall. According to the General Social Survey, approximately 20% of men report infidelity compared to 13% of women.
The landscape of infidelity changes significantly with age. Among millennials, the gender gap is narrowing, with 13% of women and 15.9% of men admitting to cheating.
Between 2000 and 2009, the highest rates of infidelity were found in men ages 60-69 (29%) and women ages 50-59 (17%). This suggests that mid-life and later years bring different relationship challenges.
Key Takeaways
- Men still cheat more than women overall, but the gender gap is narrowing among younger generations.
- Infidelity rates peak at different age ranges for men (60-69) and women (50-59), showing age-specific patterns.
- Both psychological factors and relationship dynamics influence cheating behavior across all demographics.
Who Cheats More? Breaking Down Infidelity By Gender, Age, And Relationship Type

Infidelity affects relationships across demographics, with distinct patterns emerging when examining cheating behaviors by gender and age.
Understanding these patterns can provide insight into the complexity of relationship dynamics.
Prevalence Among Men
Men have historically shown higher rates of infidelity across studies. According to recent data, 20% of men reported having sex with someone other than their spouse while married. This rate has remained fairly consistent over time.
Age plays a significant role in male cheating patterns. Men between 70-79 years old report the highest infidelity rates at 26%, while younger men show lower percentages.
Relationship length also factors into male cheating behavior. Men in long-term marriages of 20+ years show an increased likelihood of extramarital affairs compared to those in newer relationships.
Work environments with frequent travel and less supervision create more opportunities for infidelity among men.
Additionally, dissatisfaction with the sexual aspects of primary relationships often surfaces as a common reason men cite for cheating.
Prevalence Among Women
Women show different infidelity patterns than men, with 13% of women reporting having extramarital affairs. However, this gap appears to be narrowing in younger generations.
Among millennials, the infidelity gender gap is significantly smaller, with 13% of women admitting to cheating compared to 15.9% of men. This suggests evolving relationship norms among younger women.
Emotional connection often plays a more central role in female infidelity. Women frequently report emotional dissatisfaction or feeling neglected as primary motivations for seeking connections outside their relationships.
Women in unhappy marriages are more likely to cheat than those reporting marital satisfaction. Interestingly, financially independent women show higher infidelity rates, potentially indicating that economic freedom provides more opportunities for relationship choices.
Gender Comparison And Trends
While men still cheat more overall, the gender gap in infidelity is narrowing, especially among younger generations. This shift suggests changing relationship dynamics and evolving gender norms.
Age creates different infidelity patterns: younger women are more likely to cheat than their male counterparts, while the pattern reverses in older age groups. This generational difference represents a significant shift in traditional infidelity statistics.
Digital technology has transformed how infidelity occurs across genders. Both men and women now report emotional affairs conducted primarily through text messages and social media, sometimes never becoming physical.
Relationship type also influences cheating behaviors. Married individuals report lower infidelity rates than those in dating relationships or cohabiting partnerships, suggesting that commitment level affects faithfulness.
The definition of cheating itself varies between genders, with women more likely to consider emotional connections as infidelity, while men more often define cheating primarily through physical acts.
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The Role Of Age And Life Stages In Infidelity
Infidelity patterns shift noticeably across different age groups, with distinct motivations and behaviors emerging at each life stage.
Research indicates that both men and women show varying rates of cheating as they progress through different phases of life.
Younger Adults (Under 35)
In younger adults, infidelity often stems from identity exploration and relationship inexperience.
According to recent data, among married adults aged 18-29, women are slightly more likely to cheat than men. This contradicts the overall trend seen in other age groups.
Younger couples may face unique pressures that contribute to infidelity:
- Career establishment and financial stress
- Less relationship experience
- Social media and dating app accessibility
- Uncertainty about long-term compatibility
Many young adults who engage in infidelity report feeling they settled down before fully exploring their options. They may question their choices during these formative years when personal identity is still developing.
Middle-Aged Adults (35-60)
Middle age brings different infidelity triggers, often related to life transitions and relationship evolution.
During this period, men typically show higher rates of infidelity than women, with approximately 20% of men reporting extramarital relationships compared to 13% of women.
Common factors influencing middle-aged infidelity include:
- Midlife crisis feelings
- Empty nest transitions
- Career achievements or disappointments
- Long-term relationship dissatisfaction
This life stage often coincides with major life reassessments. Individuals may feel they’re running out of time to experience certain things or question whether their current relationship will fulfill them in later years.
Older Adults (Over 60)
In older age groups, infidelity rates show interesting patterns. Women in their 60s report the highest rate of infidelity at 16%, though this percentage decreases significantly among women in their 70s and 80s.
For older adults, infidelity may connect to:
- Seeking emotional connection rather than physical attraction
- Health changes affecting intimate relationships
- Retirement adjustments altering relationship dynamics
- Reconnecting with past partners through social media
Many older individuals who engage in infidelity report feeling a desire for emotional intimacy that may be missing in their primary relationship. Others describe wanting to experience romance again after decades of marriage.
Psychological And Emotional Factors That Lead To Cheating
Infidelity rarely happens randomly—it typically stems from complex psychological factors and emotional needs that aren’t being met.
People who cheat often experience internal struggles that push them toward seeking connections outside their relationships.
Evolutionary Perspectives
From an evolutionary standpoint, men and women may be driven to infidelity for different biological reasons.
Men might seek multiple partners to maximize reproductive success, while women might look for partners with better resources or genes. This perspective on infidelity suggests our ancestors’ mating strategies still influence modern behavior.
However, these biological drives don’t excuse cheating behavior. Modern humans can override these impulses through conscious choice and commitment.
Research shows that while evolutionary factors play a role, they interact with social and cultural influences that shape how people express their relationship needs.
Attachment Styles
Our early childhood experiences create attachment patterns that affect adult relationships. People with insecure attachment styles—particularly anxious or avoidant types—may be more vulnerable to infidelity.
Those with anxious attachments might cheat to seek validation when feeling insecure. They crave emotional connection and may panic when feeling abandoned.
People with avoidant attachment often fear intimacy. They might cheat to maintain emotional distance from their primary partner while still meeting their needs for connection.
Secure attachment, developed through consistent early caregiving, typically leads to healthier relationship choices and better communication during relationship difficulties.
Personality Traits
Certain personality traits correlate with higher rates of infidelity. People scoring high in narcissism, impulsivity, or sensation-seeking may be more likely to cheat on partners.
Low conscientiousness—characterized by difficulty following rules and commitments—can predict unfaithful behavior. These individuals may struggle with long-term relationship dedication.
People with high scores in neuroticism might cheat due to emotional instability and difficulty managing relationship stress. Their emotional reactions after infidelity often include depression and anxiety.
Some personality factors protect against cheating, like high agreeableness, empathy, and emotional intelligence.
Emotional Dissatisfaction
Perhaps the most common factor in infidelity is emotional disconnection within the primary relationship. When emotional needs go unmet, people become vulnerable to outside connections.
Women especially may seek affairs due to emotional dissatisfaction, feeling unappreciated or invisible in their relationship. The affair provides the emotional validation they’re missing at home.
Feelings of anger, resentment, or loneliness can create emotional distance. When communication breaks down, partners may stop sharing their deepest needs.
Boredom and routine can also lead to affairs as people seek novelty and excitement. Some individuals use infidelity as an unconscious way to address problems they can’t express directly to their partner.
Legal Implications
Infidelity can substantially impact divorce proceedings in many jurisdictions. In states with “fault” divorce laws, cheating can be grounds for divorce and may influence financial settlements.
About 54.5% of marriages where infidelity occurred end in divorce, showing how adultery frequently leads to marriage dissolution.
Some courts consider adultery when determining:
- Division of marital assets
- Alimony payments
- Child custody arrangements
- Attorney’s fees
However, the specific impact varies by location. In “no-fault” states, proof of infidelity might have a less direct influence on settlements, though it can still affect negotiations between spouses.
Documenting evidence of infidelity often becomes important if a spouse wants to use it in court. This might include texts, emails, witness statements, or even professional investigation results.
Emotional And Psychological Impact
The discovery of an affair typically causes significant emotional trauma. Depressive symptoms following disclosure are common for those betrayed by their partners. Many experience:
- Trust issues that may persist into future relationships
- Anxiety and depression
- Reduced self-esteem
- Post-traumatic stress symptoms
For the person who was unfaithful, guilt, shame, and fear often become dominant emotions. They may struggle with self-forgiveness even after the divorce is finalized.
Healing from infidelity takes time, whether couples choose to work through it or separate. Many individuals benefit from professional counseling to process their emotions during and after divorce. Support groups can also provide validation and understanding during this challenging transition.
Impact On Children
Children often suffer significant consequences when infidelity leads to divorce. They may experience:
- Confusion about loyalty to each parent
- Anger toward the parent who had the affair
- Increased anxiety about family stability
- Academic or behavioral problems
How parents handle discussions about infidelity dramatically affects children’s adjustment. Experts recommend age-appropriate honesty without burdening children with adult details or using them as emotional support.
Divorce and infidelity affect many people beyond just the couple, with children being particularly vulnerable. Parents should prioritize consistency, reassurance, and maintaining healthy co-parenting relationships despite their personal conflicts.
Professional support through family therapy helps many children process these complex emotions.
Creating stability and routine during this transition period proves essential for helping children adjust to their new family structure.
If you’re facing child support, custody, or alimony concerns due to a cheating spouse, Cooper Trachtenberg Law Group, LLC is here to help. Get trusted legal guidance now!
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Conclusion
The data on infidelity reveals a complex picture rather than simple gender differences. While men cheat at slightly higher rates overall (20% compared to 13% for women), these patterns vary significantly across age groups and generations.
Among millennials, the gender gap is narrowing, with 13% of women and 15.9% of men admitting to infidelity. This suggests evolving relationship dynamics in younger populations.
Age plays a crucial role in infidelity patterns. The tendency to cheat generally increases until about age 60 for women and 70 for men, after which it declines at similar rates for both genders.
Research indicates that emotional and sexual infidelity can affect individuals differently, though gender and sexual orientation do not always significantly interact to determine these responses.
Addressing infidelity in relationships benefits from compassionate communication, professional support when needed, and a nuanced understanding of each person’s unique circumstances rather than relying on statistical generalizations.
Infidelity can have lasting legal consequences—don’t navigate this situation alone. Cooper Trachtenberg Law Group, LLC, is ready to advocate for your future, from divorce settlements to protecting your parental rights. Book a confidential case review today!
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Frequently Asked Questions
Who cheats more, men or women?
Men cheat more often than women, with 20% of men and 13% of women admitting to infidelity in marriage. However, younger generations show a smaller gap, with 15.9% of men and 13% of women reporting infidelity.
Has the gender gap in cheating changed over time?
Yes, the gap is narrowing. Women’s infidelity rates have gradually increased, particularly among younger generations, due in part to shifting relationship dynamics and changing social norms.
Which age group has the highest rate of infidelity?
People in their 20s and 30s cheat the most, often due to less relationship experience and commitment. Infidelity risk spikes again in middle age (40s-50s), usually linked to mid-life crises.
Does the length of a relationship affect cheating rates?
Yes, relationships in the 3-5 year range are considered a “danger zone” for infidelity, as partners may face emotional or physical disconnects.
Are infidelity rates increasing in modern times?
Overall rates remain stable, but female infidelity has risen. Digital technology, dating apps, and social media have created new forms of cheating, such as emotional affairs conducted online.
What are the top reasons people cheat?
The most common factors include:
- Emotional dissatisfaction (lack of connection)
- Sexual dissatisfaction (unfulfilled desires)
- Opportunity (frequent travel, close colleagues)
- Previous infidelity (cheaters are more likely to repeat the behavior)
Do men and women cheat for different reasons?
Yes. Men typically cheat for physical or sexual variety, while women are more likely to cheat due to emotional dissatisfaction in their relationship.
How does infidelity impact divorce cases?
Infidelity can influence divorce settlements, alimony, and child custody, depending on the state and legal system. While some states consider adultery a factor in divorce proceedings, many now follow no-fault divorce laws.
Are emotional affairs considered cheating?
Yes, many experts define emotional affairs as cheating. While there may not be physical intimacy, deep emotional bonds with someone outside the relationship can damage trust just as much.
Why is female infidelity increasing?
As gender roles evolve, women have more financial independence and opportunities for extramarital connections. Studies suggest they also feel more comfortable admitting infidelity compared to past generations.